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weight: 400;”>It is very common to be nervous before approaching your partner. Many of us have at some point fallen victim to either performance anxiety or self-consciousness or some other fear factor.
weight: 400;”>Below are three main ways that lack of relaxation or fear and anxiety can harm our sex life.
1. Warnings about sex
weight: 400;”>We are warned about ways to avoid unwanted pregnancies and STDs in several ways. For many of us, these warnings run through our minds in the bedroom. This vigilance leads to unnecessary fear and anxiety, which ultimately prevents us from fully enjoying the show.
2. Unrealistic expectations based on addiction to pornography
weight: 400;”>Most people don’t get proper sex education and as a result they turn to pornography for all the information and guidance they can get. This immediately leads to unrealistic expectations of sex and leads to performance anxiety.
3. Self-awareness or image-awareness
weight: 400;”>This is a serious problem for many of us. We are constantly worried about our appearance and whether we are physically attractive enough to our partners. Whether our body turns on our partner is a serious thing that constantly bothers us, which eventually leads to performance anxiety and spoils our moments.
So, how to relax during sex and how to get rid of sexual anxiety?
1. Mostly everything is in your mind!
weight: 400;”>Although sex is a physical activity, it has more of a psychological effect. Sex is a physical manifestation of the human psyche. Don’t let your thoughts or tensions get in the way of your sexual desires. Rather, block out those worries and push them back as you focus on your partner. Pull yourself together and drown in the ocean of emotions and feelings.
2. Check your expectations
weight: 400;”>Roleplay is great, but you definitely don’t have to do it like the carpenter on Pornhub! It is very dangerous to be exposed to the kind of content that can be seen in the scripted and well-acted videos of various porn sites, filmed under some production house with about fifty people working behind the camera. A porn video is like a movie. It is completely absurd to have sexual expectations such as those where the end product is actually the product of many minds.
weight: 400;”>Your sexual act or experience is entirely your own private perspective, which should reflect your own spiritual desires or personal desires. It’s fine to refer to foreplay or set the mood for a partner, but as you move forward, you should better control your own emotions and sensations.
3. No need to rush, just give it time
weight: 400;”>Wait! Enjoy every moment. There is no need to rush to orgasm. You don’t run a marathon to finish. It’s fine to have fast food on a weekday, but don’t make it a habit every time you have sex. Your lover, just like you, would like to explore your body and identify what turns you on. So move at a pace that works for both of you and allows you to enjoy every moment, and you might end up finding something that hits the spot in the best possible way.
4. Communication is key
weight: 400;”>There is nothing like speaking your heart out to your partner. Talk about what you enjoy, guide him and also ask what your partner enjoys. Tell us about what and how you experienced during the play. However, don’t be overly critical of your partner’s performance by focusing on what they’re not doing or doing wrong.
5. Be sure of your partner
weight: 400;”>You need to understand one simple thing that your partner or the person who wants to have sex with you wants to have sex with you because you are desired by that person. Now this person can be a one night stand or a long term partner, but the point is that they decided to have sex with you because this person misses you. You don’t have to worry about all the imperfections you think you are; because chances are your partner isn’t even thinking about it. When you’re on the move, focus completely on the pleasure of the sexual journey.
6. Take awkward moments lightly and laugh it off
weight: 400;”>No one is perfect and we make mistakes, and we can make mistakes in sex too. Of course, until these mistakes are correctable and do not cause serious problems for you or your partner, such as STDs. Don’t take those awkward moments or slightly irritated moments to heart, learn from your mistakes.
7. Setting the mood
weight: 400;”>Choosing the right time and creating the right atmosphere is very important. Whether it’s your own house or some other place, make sure that the resettlement space is clean and smells good. You can light a scented candle and play your favorite music. All these will relax both you and your partner and may bring you a wonderful sexual experience.